Agggh! Emu Oil Propaganda! Bad Mojo!

I just found this reprehensible video that is obviously full of lies. Do not let the Big Oil propaganda machine take you in with its fancy commercials and high production value. Emu oil is extracted directly from the souls of the kindest and most egalitarian emus. Those who have had their oil removed must wander the planes of emu purgatory for all time.

Somali Pirates = Good Guys

yoda_pirate

Now, obviously I’m not talking about the asshats who kidnapped Captain Phillips in last weekend’s widely publicized story.

But, as it turns out, the Somali Pirate movement was started as the “Volunteer Coastguard of Somalia,” in response to major EU countries dumping nuclear waste and other toxic chemicals on the shores of the recently collapsed nation.

Apparently EU dickheads have been abusing the coastal areas off Somalia for years, illegally overfishing the waters when their own fisheries became depleted and dumping waste that could not be cheaply disposed of otherwise.

Unfortunately, once the opportunity for profit came into the equation, more of the seedy elements emerged that make up most of the “newsworthy” pirate stories of recent note.

But, just like the pirates of old, their inception was just as much a reaction to tyranny and abuses of power as it was to profit motive.

So… Yo Ho Ho, and stick it in your craw, EU. Let’s give these brave boys their due.

Magnetic Video

You will now learn more about magnetic fields than you have absorbed in your entire lifetime up to this moment… Don’t fight it.

Bars and Tones

Neat little video by Andre Chocron.

Glen Beck Calls for More Sanity. Irony Surrenders

Acclaimed Nutjob Glen Beck makes a plea to Obama for a saner, more rational policy while simulating setting a man on fire.

Billy Bob Thornton Hates Everything

I still can’t fully believe that this wasn’t staged. This is a fairly long clip of a Canadian radio personality interviewing Billy Bob Thornton’s band. Billy Bob obviously and openly hates this guy. It’s amazing.

AP Tantrum Marks Beginning of the End for Old Media

whine

Earlier this week in front of his weekly board meeting in the San Diego office, AP chairman, Dean Singleton, cried foul.

In complaining about the unlicensed use of AP stories all over the blogosphere, Singleton actually conjured up the old Network tagline: “We’re mad as hell, and we’re not going to take it anymore!”

Well, let’s visit the original context of that quote for a moment…

Read More »

Internet TV Subtext

This Rocketboom episode gives us a classic example of an Internet TV mismatch:

We have the too-hot-for-her-environs girl interviewing the SuperNerd (personified by Bre Pettis).

The too-hot girl neither cares nor understands what’s going on. Her primary function is to look as hot as possible and anchor the male demographic in place.

SuperNerd tries vainly to entertain her with his various half-built gadgets and Star Wars collectables.

She perfunctorily tries to move the interview along. He lamely tries to hold her eye contact. She tries to not visibly look disgusted.

Welcome to Internet TV.

Tom Brady: Camera-Phobe

brady

Today the New York Post is reporting that New England Patriots QB Tom Brady apparently went into a panic when some nearby paparazzi began taking photos of him and his girlfriend.

Brady was quoted as saying, “The bad men… Bad men point clicky things at Brady! Clicky thing steal soul! Brady friends stop bad men. Must stop. You use bangy thing against clicky thing.”

At Brady’s behest, his entourage opened fire at the SUV containing the paparazzi.

“Mmmm. Good friend. Brady not want see clicky thing again. Bring bad mojo to Brady village. We find clicky thing village, steal women. No more clicky babies. May Bell-O-Check be with us.”

Suck it, Warner.

Chalk up another Emu victory versus the mass media censure machine. The Iron Man as Tin Man video has been restored to Youtube after TMR was declared the winner in a dispute versus Warner Music Group.

Here it is again, in all of its under appreciated majesty.

Here’s the last dispute (against MLB Advanced Media) that the Emu prevailed in.