Obama Offers Freedom Killings to Enemy Combatants
All Hail President Obama, King of Freedom, Protector of Citizens from Ex-Patriot Clerics who happen to worship the wrong Invisible Man in the Sky. In His great wisdom, our Handsome Genius Progressive Champion has finally figured out a solution to the Bush era problem of excessive Enemy Combatant detention. Why, asks our Beloved Mocha-Skinned Sultan, detain these dangerous individuals for years on end? Why deny these freedom fighters their right to a quick and unexpected death?
And so, His Omni-Worship decreed that our armed forces, starting with the CIA, could extend Sultan Obama’s mercy killings into extra-territorial affairs. And, in His generosity, even American Citizens can now take advantage of these new freedom killings.
All Hail Our Majestic Midwestern Marlboro Man. Do your part to thank Him for setting this precedent that future, less beneficent leaders may have a blueprint to follow.
[…] still open, both wars are still going strong, sabre-rattling is increasing in Iran, and we have a new executive order enabling the assassination of American citizens. So even the (mostly justified) fearmongering about Bush’s policies hasn’t actually […]