Now Playing – The New Game Releases for 1/5/09-1/11/09
Welcome to NOW PLAYING, a column where I’ll be covering the new games releases of the week. Normally, I’d weed out the garbage and focus on the gems, but we’re in the middle of the post-holiday humdrums. All the AAA titles have come and gone with Christmas, which means that the pickings are slim and I’m left rambling about shovelware.
Bigfoot: Collision Course (DS)
– Upon seeing this listing, I was confused as to why anyone would produce a Bigfoot video game in 2009. To his (its?) credit, Bigfoot had been part of the Power Team, a kickass group of crime fighters that included a barbarian and an anthropomorphic tomato. But surely no person under the age of 20 actually remembered the monster truck. I forgot to consider two crucial factors – (1) rednecks love monster trucks, and (2) Bigfoot currently has an Emmy-nominated (!) cartoon on the Discovery Kids Channel. While these facts may justify the existence of this game, they definitely doesn’t justify your purchase.
CID The Dummy (PS2, PSP, Wii, PC)
– Speaking of licensed games that are about a decade too late, here we have a 3D platformer starring a crash test dummy. I had hoped that it would star the “famous” Canadian folk-rock band in some kind of wacky misadventure (or perhaps some kind of Guitar Hero-esque music game), but I was sadden to discover that the protagonist was just an actual crash test dummy. I’m not entirely sure this game is actually coming out (since it doesn’t seem to exist in Gamestop database), but Amazon tenaciously claims that I can order it, so here it is.
Elebits: The Adventure of Kai & Zero (DS) – GAME OF THE WEEK
– The original ELEBITS was an early title for the Nintendo Wii where you searched for strange energy-based creatures called Elebits. It didn’t quite set the sales charts on fire, so Konami decided to move the franchise to the Nintendo DS. In this 2D adventure, Kai searches the world for more Elebits in order to… Well, I’m not quite sure why. Let’s pretend that he’s searching for the cure to the global economic collapse. In any case, the sprite-based art-style looks charming and the Ghostbusters Proton Pack-style game mechanics should be well suited to the DS stylus. If you’ve got the “Got to Catch Them All” madness that I suffer from, this game will be right up your alley.
Fishing Master World Tour (Wii)
– I’m pretty sure there’s only been one awesome fishing game in the history of video games and that’s SEGA BASS FISHING for the Sega Dreamcast. And really, that game only succeeds because of the ridiculous fishing controller shaped like an actual rod and tackle. Sure, you’re just hunting digital fish, but when you actually have to crank the reel, there’s a sublime pleasure to be found. I’m sure FISHING MASTER WORLD TOUR includes some kind of inane waggle controls, but it’s definitely not going to include a fishing controller. Choose wisely, friends.
Jumble Madness (DS)
– I don’t like the Jumble when it comes in my Sunday paper, but that may be due to its proximity to Marmaduke. Man, I hate that dog. But if you like the jumble or giant orange dogs, this game may be for you. (Giant orange dog may not be included with the game.)
Paws & Claws Pampered Pets (DS)
– Yet another of the hojillion cheap NINTENDOGS rip-offs that have flooded the gaming market. I imagine you use the DS’ stylus to pamper your pets or something like that. If you’re old enough to be reading this site, you should have no interest in this game.
Paws & Claws Pet Resort (Wii)
– The same garbage as above, except with waggle instead of stylus action. That shouldn’t change your mind. Unless you’re a 9 year old girl.
Saints Row 2 (PC)
– A PC port of the GTA-clone that managed to provide a better GTA experience than GRAND THEFT AUTO 4. This game would normally be my Game of the Week, but after the debacle that was GTA 4 on the PC (summary: everything was broken), I think it’s better to wait and see if this game actually functions. Nonetheless, it may be worth the risk to try out the greatest nut-kicking simulator ever created by man.
—–
Howard writes daily about video games and assorted pop culture at We’ll Fix It In Post. New podcasts are posted every Friday.
Really good blog.Many thanks Again and again. Will keep reading…