This man can’t believe how stupid CNN has gotten.

Let’s examine this afternoon’s headlines, shall we?:

Now, there are a ton of reasons to root against economic recovery in the US, ranging from hoping for a total collapse of capitalism to saving the environment to simply giving the country an unprecedented dose of humility. But to avoid flight delays? Really?

Also, let’s look at the context in which CNN so cleverly chose this horror story of the coming flight delays. Was it just a slow news day? Is there nothing else to report to Americans hungry for 24/7 news?

Let’s see… the seminal turning point in the war in Afghanistan, an upcoming movement on healthcare that has dominated the American political scene for the last few months, the first ever serious excavation on the moon via explosion, the Taliban claiming credit for the latest bombing… yeah, I’d probably choose the specter of increased flight delays that comes from more scheduled flights too.

What’s great about the article is that it’s not even news so much as basic logic. When more planes are in the air, it creates more traffic, thus leading to more delays. The same principle by which, uh, all traffic in the world has always worked, from horse and buggies to trains to cars. Spectacular.

CNN might as well have put a simple math equation as the top story of October 8th. It would probably be less intuitive to the average reader.

To be fair, there were also some colossal duds they didn’t pick for the top story, though it makes you wonder if CNN has any editing at all on their website. Levi Johnston stripping? Jennifer Hudson has a kid? Ted Williams’ frozen head? Since when does CNN stand for Celebrity Nothing News?

At least they also ran a feature on the avalanche video. We totally scooped CNN.

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