Brought to you by the Showtime hit, Weeds.

A Cracked contributor really let Carlos Mencia have it in this in-depth analysis of Mecia’s Twittering habits…

Poor guy. No one wants to mock his unjustified celebrity anymore. What did he ever do to deserve this? I mean, other than riding on the coattalis of his famous mother, and stealing other comics’ material…

This narrator reminds me of Dennis Quaid’s computer in Innerspace.

I finally figured out what I want for my birthday… Unfortunately there’s only one known set in existence and it’s going for $5,500.

For those not initiated, this art installation/board game is based on the Hunter S Thompson novel/movie Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas.

Speaking of which, here’s an old BBtv show I created with a similar theme.

Prepare to have your mind blown in 3…
2..
1…

boom.

Who knew that the Late Late Late Show Host actually knew how to run a serious interview? Very surprised at the quality of this piece, especially given how rarely Torre allows the media access.

Originally posted on The Fresh Scent.

To get a sense of what the enhanced version of this otherwise craptastic Ben Stiller movie might sound like, look no further than this history lecture by former University of Florida Professor, John Hall. Unfortunately, he’s a former professor now because the University got wind of this command performance and immediately dismissed him from the faculty.

That doesn’t seem particularly fair. Apparently the University of Florida operates on the ’stoning for being a stoner’ philosophy. Code of Hammurabi? Duuuuuude…

Originally posted on The Fresh Scent.

Like a hungry stoner scavenging through the kitchen cupboards for a stray graham cracker, the US Border Patrol has found its resources sadly lacking recently. Amidst administration demands for more recruitment and hiring, the Border Patrol has turned to a tried and true tactic of depleted armies throughout history — conscripting children.

The Explorers Program, a Boy Scouts of America affiliate, trains the pubescent in the art of raiding dens of iniquity, seizing illegally imported goods, and patrolling barren wastelands. In the words of a California sheriff’s deputy involved with the program:

This is about being a true-blooded American guy and girl.

While it’s unclear what his hermaphroditic reference is all about, it does seem like a wonderful opportunity for these kids to participate in the formative experience that is pepper-spraying a starving immigrant right in the eye socket. That kind of invaluable interaction will really put some hair on the chests of our next crop of soldier-kids.

Urrgghh. Again.

Dear Minnesota Twins,

You are now 3-22 in Yankee Stadium since 2002, thanks to three more losses over the weekend in each of which you had the lead and then decided it would only be right to give the game, through a host of hideous scoring squanders, pitching mistakes and fielding errors, to your aging, average opponent (despite its having spent 400 million in the offseason) which needs only your presence to feel good about itself again.  Since you seem incapable of rising above the standard of gutless incompetence which characterizes all of the sports teams in your city, we would very much appreciate it if you immediately disband and allow professional teams to take your place.  You know, the ones which don’t fall on their swords the minute they see a pinstriped uniform.

Sincerely,

Every other team in baseball

P.S. Oakland Athletics: please see above.

Quick hit informational video about the SWAT reform movement.