“I’m trying to find the words to describe this girl without being disrespectful.”

Oh, Akon, you are such a gentleman.

“Nothing you can compare to your neighborhood Ho.”

Oh, stop!  You are too kind.

Though this story is still developing, it seems clear that a portion of Interstate 5 will be uninhabitable for some time.

My only concern is that now I am contributing to the number of hits this is getting…

This is a comedy video, not child friendly, put out by a group of NYC comics.  For all of you that can’t make it out to the real NYC scene, here’s a little taste.

You can also check out the original “Damn I wish I was Your Lover” by Sophie B. Hawkins if you’d like to see what they had parodied…not as fun, but very 80’s and she actually uses “shucks” as a lyric…

If you’re a British citizen with a vivid imagination, a glance at the 2012 London Olympic festivities could have you branded a trafficker of child pornography.

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Discovered a treat on Vimeo last night. It’s a full 70-minute stand up routine of Carlin and Hicks disciple, Marc Maron.

This routine, filmed a couple weeks ago at the Upright Citizen’s Brigade theater, will give you a good sense of Maron’s plodding, dark, self-loathing, intellectual style. He seems equally depressed as the Patron Saint Bill Hicks would be having to face a media world as over commercialized and sold out as ours is.

Elba Reinshocker embraces her mother, Hilde, after being discovered in a basement where she was chained up for 22 years as a sex slave. Hilde said she “could not comprehend how happy she was” to learn that this was her daughter’s fate.

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Run out of things to watch while at work?

I don’t think it needs any description.

Ok, this is probably borderline NSFW, but it’s too damn funny to pass up. Via cartoonist, Dan Meth.

Or at least that is the sort of riveting storyline that sells craptastic Quiznos subs these days.