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We can debate the efficacy of violence against anyone all we like, but it’s pretty clear that committing violence against the very young is a bad idea.
In other news, spanking is remarkably ineffective at changing the behavior of baby lab rats.
Continue reading “From the No-Crud Bureau: Violence Ineffective vs. Pre-Rational Beings” »
Great story from the Consumerist about a New England Mom who feeds an entire family of children, dogs, and birds for less than $10 a week.
FYI, she does not accomplish this feat by slowly feeding the bird to the dog while slowly feeding the dog to the children. Apparently, Kathy Spencer is a coupon savant, and has fine tuned the art of discount shopping into something more akin to Subversive Promotional Manipulation.
This is a worthwhile skill set to have.
Fun fact I learned is that dimples are a dominant gene. If one parent has a dimple, they say its guaranteed that the child will have a dimple. So, just think…some time in the future…almost all of us will have dimples and then smooth cheeks will be considered cute and worthy of a cheek pinch!
Well, it inspired me to find out what else is dominant and I don’t understand what mother nature has in mind for the future of appendages.
Continue reading “Fun Facts: Dominant versus Recessive Genes” »
Cute lecture by Ian Bogost of Persuasive Games about his five year old’s struggle to balance his virtual finances.
The MEP Report is first to report on this exclusive. Sources have discovered that Jon, of Jon and Kate plus 8, has an illegitimate son. Most news reports have covered Jon’s affair, and others have picked up on his new girlfriend (way to waste no time at all, Jon…). However, MEP report contacts have informed us that the affair was not just a one night stand! “I could have handled that,” said Kate to a friend, “a simple affair would have been fine…but when I heard he had another child, making his total nine to my eight…I just couldn’t stand for that.”
MEP Report photographers have acquired this exclusive photo.
A Cracked contributor really let Carlos Mencia have it in this in-depth analysis of Mecia’s Twittering habits…
Poor guy. No one wants to mock his unjustified celebrity anymore. What did he ever do to deserve this? I mean, other than riding on the coattalis of his famous mother, and stealing other comics’ material…
Who knew that the Intrawebs not only served your basic research needs, but your Fabio rose-toting needs as well?
This low-budget ridiculousness brought to you by crap purveyor, Everything is Terrible.
Senavene April 2008
A year ago, I took Senavene to the post office. She was strapped to my front wearing all pink, half covered in a pink blanket, with a pink pacifier in her mouth. Why? We were given LOTS of pink, I swear. I put “yellow please” on the registry, but I don’t think anyone paid attention.
Anyways, what did the teller ask me? “How old is he?” How old is HE?
After 14 months of this, I can honestly say I don’t care that people continue to call her a boy. I’m told it’s common for babies with very little hair. Most moms tape a bow to their daughter’s bare heads. But honestly I don’t care. I simply respond by telling them how old she is. I’m more fascinated by how someone’s brain would ignore all the social clues in the form of pink paraphernalia and use the male pronoun. Not only that, they quite often also say that “he is really beautiful.” I can’t blame them. I mean she is gorgeous.
Sent image to Wilhelmina kids, but no response...sigh, there's goes her College Fund
But again, I digress. My question is: are most people stupid or are their brains on auto-pilot and make errors because there is no gender neutral pronoun? People can’t say “how old is it?” That would piss any parent off. So, they either need a gender neutral pronoun or come up with some convoluted phrasing that sounds weird — “how old is your baby?” “Pardon me, have you any Grey Poupon?”
So to continue the sexism, SNL came up with a skit focusing on MALE bald babies. Because don’t we all feel bad for the bald male babies?
Pay no mind to creating something for the poor, misunderstood FEMALE bald babies. Well not any more, thanks to the mental prowess of the fine people at Baby Bangs. So, which one do you think we should get? We’re taking votes. I think I’m liking “Fairy Tale Flowers.”
For those of you who are good parents and don’t let your child(ren) watch t.v. or who have no child(ren) and therefore you don’t watch kids shows, then you may not know that Sesame Street knows where it’s at. They know that adults are also watching and therefore plan accordingly. They have Hollywood and sports stars do cameos. Elmo tosses in little jokes and puns that only an adult would understand.
Many other shows, on the other hand, do not, and this makes for either annoying or embarrassingly funny moments. Hence, this post thanks to the show “My Friend Rabbit” that our Tivo recorded thinking we might like it and that I watched, then deleted before showing Senavene because it’s retarded and stupid. But before deleting it, I made you a little edited clip. I hope you enjoy. Whether you see what I see and giggle your *&$% off…or you don’t see what I see and enjoy the educational cartoon…either way…enjoy. Please note, that if you are one of those that sees what I see, I highly recommend watching it again and again, each time catching more little silly moments fitting the theme.
I’ve heard there’s an uproar about Nadya Suleman having octuplets. So, as the resident MEP mother I thought I should weigh in and risk putting my hugely opinionated, extremely feathery opinion out there. However, I don’t want to single out Suleman. Yes I know she’s mentally unbalanced and will soon channel all of Storey’s and Russ’ tax money into more Angelina Jolie lip implants (this should be reason enough to dispise her for ruining my bisexual Jolie fantasies). However, that’s not why we should be alarmed and therefore we should not only focus on her.
