Eight is Enough
Out of abject frustration, I wrote this ditty about my fantasy baseball team. It is sung to the tune of “The Twelve Days of Christmas.”
On the first day of injury, my roto-squad gave to me…..
A Smoltz shoulder surgery.
On the second day of injury, my squad gave to me…
A Duschererererer Elbow
and a Smoltz shoulder surgery
On the third day of injury, my squad gave to me…
A Carpenter Pectoral,
A Duscherererer Elbow
and a Smoltz shoulder surgery.
On the fourth day of injury, my squad gave to me…
A Ricky Romero flame out
A Carpenter Pectoral
A Duschererer Elbow
and a Smoltz shoulder surgery.
On the fifth day of injury my squad gave to me…
a Tiiiiired Daisuke!
A Romero flame out
A Carpenter’s Pec
A Ducherererer Elbow
and a Smoltz shoulder surgery.
On the sixth day of injury, my squad gave to me….
Big Vlady Can’t Swing
A Tiiiiired Daisukeeeeeee!
A Romero flame out
A Carpenter’s Pec
A Duchererer Elbow
and a Smoltz shoulder surgery..
On the seventh day of injury, my squad gave to me…
A Thome back spasm
Big Vlady Can’t Swing
A Tiiiiired Daisukeeeeeeeee!
A Romero flame out
A Carpenter’s Pec
A Duschererererer Elbow
and a Smoltz shoulder surgery…..
On the eight day of injury, my squad gave to me…
A decrepit Travis Hafner
A Thome back spasm
A Vlady that can’t swing…
A Tiiiiiiired DAAAAAAIIIISUUUUKEEEEEEEEEE!!!
A Romero flame out
A Carpenter’s Pec
A Duscherererere Elbow
AND A SMOLTZ SHOULDER SURGERRRRYYYYYYY.
For more on chronically injured ballplayers, see this Mep Video.